Q    What do I do with used hotdog water?

A    Start a punk band called Used Hotdog Water and at concerts spray it on the audience between songs.

 

Q    When I look in the mirror is my reflection looking back?

A    Not always. About ten percent of the time when you look into a mirror you are actually looking at your exact duplicate in a parallel universe. You can tell because everyone there wears a yellow sticky note saying they are from a parallel universe, unfortunately, because its parallel, they always wear the note on their backs.

 

Q    What is the meaning of the universe, life, and everything?

A    42

 

Q    Is life just a computer simulation? Are we all existing inside some higher being's video game?

A    up up down down left right a b a b select start

 

Q    Are you insane?

A    The voices in my head tell me to say no.

 

Q    Why are there 5,280 feet in a mile?

A    Because there are 26,400 toes in a mile.

 

Q    How many fingers am I holding up?

A    16

 

Q    What day is it?

A    The day after yesterday, in some cultures known as the day before tomorrow.

 

Q    Are you psychic?

A    I knew you were going to ask that.